do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
