Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
