Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
