quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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