Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
