i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
