to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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