My hair reeks of homosexuality.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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