You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Can I color on your dick again?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Randomize
