i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
