this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
