She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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