question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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