My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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