can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
