check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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