Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
