I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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