So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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