Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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