Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
