I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
