well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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