i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Boobs speak an international language.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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