you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
