People in love make me want to vomit
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It's rum buckets o'clock
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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