apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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