Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
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