Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
