ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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