carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize