I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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