Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize