I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
