its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
