You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
