Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize