So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Randomize
