i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
