It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
