OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
