I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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