So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize