I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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