Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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