suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
