everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
