and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
