It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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