Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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