I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Couch. On fire.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize