i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize