I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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